Do you ever wonder if David had writer’s block? Or Solomon or Paul? How about Moses when he wrote the first five books of the Old Testament for the people of God? Did they have days when they couldn’t figure out how to say what God was showing them, their grammar made them stumble, or they just felt all the pressure of communicating well? I hope so! Hear me out, I know that sounds rude, but I would like to submit that they were humans just like me. Also, misery loves company.
This week is Band of Opals’ first birthday! One year and 70 posts later I am pleased that God has helped me work consistently if not elegantly. It was very easy to write at the beginning and there was so much in me that I just couldn’t stop. I wasn’t as worried about grammar, subscriptions, calendars, and all the other details. I was finally doing what God had created me to do and there was a multitude of stories, sermons, and ideas that were all dammed up waiting to burst.
I’m not suffering from writer’s block, but writing feels different this year than it did last year. Some weeks I write 3 articles before there is one that even makes sense. Some weeks I write none. I go back and forth looking for the right photo, the right day to post, and oscillate between serious and lighthearted.
My writing situation doesn’t look like a pretty photo either. At 4:30 am, 4 days a week my alarm goes off and I hit the snooze. The second time it goes off I use the bathroom, grab a glass of water, and sit in a cushy chair at my kitchen desk, which is none too clean most of the time. This morning as I was typing a spider crawled up the backside of my glass of water and sat happily on the rim. I didn’t even get a new glass of water after I dispatch him with a squeal. I’m just being careful not to put my lips where he was sitting. That’s where I’m at.
God has led me to expand expand expand all at once and it’s not just writing. I am planning my second Women’s Retreat for this fall, gave an Advent Podcast a go, and have led two in person studies on Rebuilding. I am working on the first draft of a study called Strongholds based on the Battle of Jericho and working to explore publishing my studies which involve lots of rewriting and building my audience before I even get started. Some of these things are so outside of my comfort zone that I am tempted to just take a long break and cuddle on the couch with my toddler.
It would just make me feel better if David had writer’s block sometimes or Solomon wrote some Proverbs that were flops or even sat on his plush golden throne on a Tuesday with a big red pimple in the middle of his forehead. All day his subjects would come kneel before him but as they rose, Solomon would see their eyes drifting up and he would know they were looking right at his blemish. There’s no way to be sure but at least I have Paul who killed a young man with boredom during his teaching. It’s true! Check out Acts 20. Thank goodness for the power of Christ that raised him.
The truth is that the Bible’s men and women were humans just like us. They didn’t know the end of their story, and even the prophets had plenty that was left to mystery in their lives. When they were traveling, getting married, learning trades, attending funerals, preparing for war, studying the law, learning to cast out demons, and trying to pay bills, they had doubts. Doubts about what God had told them, about God’s timeline, and about if they were really up to the task. There were good and bad days, successes, and failures. They tripped, they sneezed when their hands were too full to cover their faces, they had colds, and eyelashes stuck in their eyes. They were also all lavishly loved by their Creator.
The other thing every single person who has even followed God has in common is that He has asked us for more than what we can do by ourselves. He empowers the weak and makes a way where there is no way. He gives us faith and shows us how to grow it. He comes close and comforts, enables, reveals, disciplines, guides, strengthens, and says “Jump! I’ll catch you.”
There’s no need to be a perfect human. There’s also no way to be a perfect human. I don’t need anything but a relationship with God and some obedience to get it done. He’s the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and end, the Powerhouse, and the Miracle Worker. I’m just one of His daughters, learning to have faith and work at something that seems out of my reach.
17 Elijah was a human being, even as we are. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years.
James 5:17
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